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“A lot of bad habits like nail-biting and nail-picking persist because they serve a purpose,” says Dr. Pauline Wallin, a psychologist in Pennsylvania and author of Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide for Transforming Self-defeating Behavior. “They’re a behavior developed to help you deal with stress: When you’re focusing on a raggedy fingernail, you can temporarily avoid thinking about what’s really bothering you.” To start building better responses to stress, first identify your “trigger” situations, she says. Be prepared for these vulnerable times with a friendly, two-part self-challenge.
Part one: “Tell yourself, ‘For the next 15 minutes, I am not going to bite or pick my nails,’” Wallin says. If 15 minutes is just too long to manage, try five. The point is, urges like these don’t last all that long, so the odds are good that by the time your mini-challenge is over, your desire to get at your fingernails will have disappeared. And if not, the exercise isn’t in vain. Even temporarily delaying an urge builds up your cognitive muscles, so you’ll be better able to control your impulses next time.
Part two: Try to keep your hands occupied. Knit, do crossword puzzles, doodle, fiddle with coins in your pocket—any of these activities would make a less damaging habit.
Neither of these challenges will be easy at first, so be sure to reward yourself for every little triumph. And treat yourself to extra sleep. Not only do you deserve it, but when you’re happy and well-rested, your brain will find it easier to keep your fingernails safe from predators.
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